When the Burnout is Real

My spark, passion and fire felt lost to the world

Giving yourself a timeout to recharge (and multiply the time you think you need by 5x) helps accelerate you in the end

It finally feels like I am on the other side. I started my Master’s degree in the midst of COVID, while I battled demons, fought isolation and all the unhealthy coping mechanisms that came with it. RED’s know how to push themselves, and it can often feel like second nature. If there is no adrenaline or edge to life, are we even living?! I found the edge of what I could push my body to do and it was not a pretty outcome. After graduating in 2022, as much as I tried to fight it, I felt real RED burnout.

Burnout in my RED experience felt like I was living in shades of grey in world that moved too quickly. I was used to living life in the fast lane filling my days to the brim and welcoming new challenges head on. However, I found myself being a fully ‘functional’ body, living, breathing, working, studying and travelling, but not at all truly present. It was like a scene in movies where the actress is standing still and the world around them was blurred and on fast forward. I found my feelings muted, and rarely had energy to disagree, get excited or anything beyond nod my head in agreeance. My spark, passion and fire felt lost into the world of grey. I felt weak and betrayed that all my favorite RED traits had abandoned me.

After denial wore off, like a true RED, I dealt with symptoms the only way I knew how – I researched and quickly created a strict program for myself that included rest, recharge and resetting in order to recover as fast as possible. I had dreams of creating a company that helps ambitious corporate workers recover from their burnout. I wanted to use myself as a test subject and document the journey for data results. Let me tell you – when your body needs to stop, it finds a way to stop. Regardless of the intensive therapies, healers, naturopaths and yoga classes, my burnout far outlasted the four-step program I put myself on and it took just over a year to start feeling like myself.

Now, on the other side of burnout, I look back on how hard that experience was. I reflect back on what I learned from those years and give myself a high five for taking the time to properly recover. Results were not fast and staying true to the idea that one day I’d feel the fire again kept me going. I empathize for any RED’s out there who have pushed themselves to the limit. Whether it be from chasing the promotion, proving yourself at a new job, working two jobs or being supermom – don’t forget to put your overall wellbeing first. Be honest and truthful about how you feel, and it’s okay not be one hundred percent all the time. It’s not easy for a RED to feel ‘weak’, or perform sub optimally, but giving yourself a timeout to recharge (and multiply the time you think you need by 5x) helps accelerate you in the end.